• We Can’t Share the Same Darkness

    November 30, 2017 Kate

    I haven’t been depressed in a long time. For someone who spent most of their teen and early adult life juggling doctors, diagnosis’s, and medications, this is a big deal. But I still have a darkness in me. I can feel it. Not every day or even every week, but it’s there. A weight that…

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  • Warning Signs

    November 29, 2017 Kate

    Warning Signs: — Softening my edges  — Making myself small  — Talking myself up, lying, exaggerating  — Feeling insecure  — I stop making  — I start drinking/eating too much. Excesses.  — I put my life on the back burner  — Play to my darkness  — Feeling guilty/shame  I’ve spent a lot of time over the…

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  • I Thought I’d Be Married by Now

    November 28, 2017 Kate

    I thought I’d be married by now. When I was in my early twenties imagining what the next 5 or 10 years of my life would look like, I always thought I’d by married by 27 and have my first kid by 30. I don’t know where I got these number from. For someone who’s…

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  • Ask For Help

    November 27, 2017 Kate

    Things I know I need to do: Ask for help. Things I don’t do: Ask for help. It’s a funny thing, isn’t it? No matter how many times we learn this lesson—no matter how good we feel and how many wonderful things happen when we do set our ego aside—we seem to forget. We seem…

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  • I Don’t Know How To Make Money

    November 22, 2017 Kate

    I don’t know how to make money. I mean, I know HOW to make money. I just don’t know… how to make money. I don’t know how I want to make money. I left my proper full-time job over the summer to focus on doing my own thing. I’ve always know I’d want to “do my…

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  • Smells Like Entitlement

    November 20, 2017 Kate

    Why doesn’t he like me? Why isn’t he proud of me? Why doesn’t he want to show me off? Why doesn’t he want to take care of me? Why doesn’t he follow up when I say I’m anxious? Why doesn’t he ask why? Why doesn’t he ask how I am? Why doesn’t he care? Why…

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  • I Think I’m Obsessed With Being Right

    November 17, 2017 Kate

    “Many people become so obsessed with being right about their life that they never end up actually living it.” Oh, damn. I read that this morning in Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck (lol) and it’s stuck with me all day. This could apply to so many things but it’s got…

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  • Crisis Precipitates Evolution

    November 16, 2017 Kate

    I did it. I figured out what I need and I asked for it. I drove up there and I looked them straight in the eye and I asked for it. You know how people talk about “standing in your truth?” Well, that’s what I did. I stood there, straight and rooted, my voice projecting…

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  • You (OK, I) Need a Plan

    November 14, 2017 Kate

    “You need a plan, or you’re always going to feel like you’re not doing enough.” —Eric Barker Ahhh planning. We’ll file that under, Things You Know You Should Do But Don’t. I’ve always been pretty good at day-to-day planning by using to-do lists and calendars to manage the stuff I need to get done (I…

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  • (Outdated) Survival Instincts

    November 13, 2017 Kate

    “I won’t have crap like that lying around.” That’s what they said about my art. We’d just got a new fridge and I’d taken the box and made a house out of it. I’d cut out a door and windows, made shutters, painted the inside and outside… It was perfect. Perfect for me. Later that…

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