The World Owes Me
I realized something today.
I was having breakfast reading What To Do When It’s Your Turn by Seth Godin and I got to the section on obligation, where he explains why the feeling of being owed is toxic. He talks about how the productive artist “acts as though the audience doesn’t owe her anything.”
And that’s when it hit me…
I feel like the world owes me.
Deep down I have this hope—this expectation—that I’ll be “discovered” one day. I’m cringing typing that, but it’s true.
I’m waiting for my moment.
More specifically, I realized, I’m waiting for someone else to give it to me.
I want to be chosen. I want someone to come along and look at my work and praise me for it. I want to be told I’m talented and generous and selfless. That I’m special. And that they want to give me a Big Shiny Opportunity.
That’s how it works, right? Work long enough and hard enough and be good enough so that you’ll get discovered one day, right? Then the money comes, right? And this moment becomes an anecdote for interviews when they ask “how you got here”…
Here’s the problem with that. It’s passive. It’s putting your future—your power—in someone else’s hands. It’s pinning your worth on external validation. It’s tying yourself to outcomes.
Waiting to be found, I realized, is just another way to let yourself off the hook.
But to see that… Freedom.
Cherry pear pie (!!) from Bakeri in Williamsburg, yesterday, where I enjoyed a little afternoon reading break. Because, pie.